My Update

Caution: The following post was written while under the effect of alledgly "non-drowsy" allergy medication and may be subject to randomness, a rambling tone, and curious uses of the word "bowling ball".

I haven't had a chance to check in in a little bit, the primary reason being that I'm visiting my mom in BC and find myself depending on a ten year old Compaq Presario for internet access. The bright side is that I have the perspective that using a computer that would have seemed cutting edge when I was in high school really isn't all that great, and that, really, my computer back in Hamilton, for all it's problems, really isn't too bad. It can actually play videos, for one thing.

The other reason why I haven't been around lately is I've found myself unable to think clearly without regular doses of Sinutab and aspirin, and even then I'm still feeling pretty bowling bowl-ish. No idea why this is the case -- I don't experience sinus headaches when I get colds, but I've been getting those "cold sweats" and general feelings of disorientation for a few days now. I suspected it might have to do with the dust that collected in my old bedroom (which would be the only thing that could affect my allergies since it's been raining since I got here), but as it is, I'm at a loss and feeling pretty out of it.

The trip has been worth it though, since it's been nice seeing my mom and all my stuff, and I've been enjoying Teletoon Retro, which I still don't get back in Hamilton. It's been great fun watching all the Looney Tunes, Rocky and Bullwinkle, and other programs. I've even caught a few episodes of Superfriends, but gosh, is it ever a messed up show. The first episode had Superman fall through a black hole and travel back in time to Krypton before it exploded (now I'm no scientist, but even I know they don't work that way), and through the use of some deus ex machina, prevent Krypton's destruction. When he goes back through the black hole and into the present he learns that because he was never on earth the Legion of Doom successfully took over the world. So naturally, instead of doing something as simple as sending his own younger self to Earth, Superman removes his device and lets Krypton blow up. Which is really messed up, if you think about it. And I figure since Superman didn't bother thinking about it, one of us may as well.

The last segment in the episode which had Aquaman and Black Vulcan stop the Titanic (which, naturally, sprung to life and began attacking people), by sending into an iceberg in the same area it originally crashed was pretty messed up too, but I can't decide if it was more messed up because of the whole 'real-world' aspect. Either way, the guys who wrote for that show were all kinds of sick, man.

Anyway, I'll try to check in soon. Bye for now, then.

Worse than the "Star Wars Christmas Special"?

I stumbled upon the fabled Legends of the Superheroes special from the late 70s on Youtube about a half hour ago and it's every bit as terrible as you'd assume it to be. It was a comedy program featuring very comic-accurate versions of a lot of big name and lesser known DC Superheroes. Normally that would be enough to capture my interest -- there is something neat about seeing characters from the printed page come to life -- but it's really bad. Like Star Wars Christmas Special bad, except no one wants to see this, and DC isn't worried about people watching it because, quite frankly, who would want to.

I'd considered posting the "roll call" intro clip here because of how cool it is seeing characters like Hawkman, the Flash, Huntress and Black Canary in live-action, but once it got to the villain roll-call, cool as it is to see very comic-accurate representations of Solomon Grundy, Mordru, and Weather Wizard (plus Frank Gorshin as the Riddler), it just killed me. The dreadful performances and weak attempts at humor punctuated by repetitious laugh-tracks is just terrible. That alone would warrant a look... that is if that were the worst the special had to offer.

No, the worst part of the Legends of the Superheroes would have to be the appearance of Ghetto Man: black superhero and cheerfully racist stereotype. With jokes about how having Green Lantern on the team doesn't count as colored superhero, and how Hawkman's not so tough ("Let him walk through Harlem them wings on; by the time he gets to Lennox avenue, he'd be Kentucky Fried") you really start why NBC, DC Comics, Hanna Barbara, and about four dozen cast and crew members, thought this was a good idea. And it gets worse -- when I started writing this post I started checking around to figure out which network this bloody mess aired on and discovered that there were actually TWO Legends of the Superheroes specials that aired! The first was the one with the villains, the second was the one with the roast (featuring our old friend, Ghetto Man).

The bright side to this whole thing is that hardly anyone even remembers these specials, and those that do or those like myself who've stumbled on it years after the fact unilaterally agree that it's absolutely terrible and should be erased from existence.

That said, here's a clip. And yes, I am being ironic.

JLU vs. Superfriends

Here's a link to a great article online comparing Superfriends and Justice League Unlimited:

http://toddalcott.livejournal.com/65562.html

Here's an excerpt for whet your appetite:

"In Superfriends, Batman has a computer and a cave full of gadgets, Wonder Woman has a magic rope and an invisible plane, Green Lantern has a magic ring, Flash is fast, Superman has his multitudinous powers, Aquaman talks to fish. Those are all fine attributes, but they do not, in and of themselves, constitute character. If all that mattered was the number of powers, Martian Manhunter would be a more popular superhero than Superman.

"What the producers of Superfriends chose to do is give all their heroes the exact same personality, whether they are the Last Son of Krypton, the Dark Knight, the Amazon Princess or The Guy Who Talks to Fish. The heroes of Superfriends are uniformly game, brave, chipper, chatty, easily startled and, paradoxically, unflappable. No sooner do they exclaim "Great Krypton/Hera/Gotham/Neptune!" than they pull some improbable solution out of the air and calmly implement it (as Seanbaby mentions, this solution often involves "spinning around" the bad guy/explosion/missile/lava/monster/lava-monster until the spinning affects it somehow).

"This conceptual blunder, not the dumb plots or the cheap animation, is why Superfriends is so reviled. Television can soar on dumb plots and cheap animation, it cannot survive without characters. This is why episodes of Superfriends feel so shallow, repetitive and lame; there are seven main characters and they all think and act exactly the same way. Think about it: Hanna-Barbera actually gave the members of the Justice League less personality than they gave to the members of the Mystery Gang."

Honestly, I don't get why some folks are so hung up on Superfriends. It's the same thing with shows like He-Man and Ninja Turtles. I get affection for old cartoons you watched as a kid, but really, a lot of those shows are pretty bad. Not just the animation, but the writing and voice acting too. And hey, there are things I liked as a kid that I've rewatched as an adult and found nostalgic enjoyment in, but they're far from the be-all, end-all.