Random/Useless Thoughts of the Moment

What's the appeal of Saved by the Bell? It wasn't a very good show, and yet it's been running continuously since it first aired twenty years ago. I like to think I'm a fairly intelligent person with an eye for quality television, and yet, if it's on, I'll watch it, even though I know it's not that great. Even when it was still airing new episodes, I knew it wasn't that great. I remember thinking as a ten year old that it "really went downhill once Screech's voice changed". It always bugged me too how every non-main cast member student was some sort of stereotype, and how all of the classes seemed to be held in that one room across the hall from Mr. Belding's office, and how 75% of all classes were taught by Mr. Tuttle or Mr. Dewey. And still, God help me, if I come across an episode, odds are I'll stay with it at least until the commercial break. Maybe they have some kind of hypnotic thing going on, like that episode where Zack put a hidden message in a song to get Bayside's female student body to fall for him during that Valentine's Day, heart-swapping thing.

Now I don't know what's worse. That I admitted to watching Saved by the Bell*, or that I made reference to an episode.

*I caution to add that that's infrequently, if ever. Just so we're clear.

Cancellation Blues

Today I found out one of my favorite television programs and one of my favorite comic titles have been canceled. Pushing Daisies appears to have halted production with it's thirteenth episode, and Blue Beetle will probably be ending in a few months.

Aside from being a kick in the head, this comes after several other kicks in the head as no less than seven other comic titles I've been following are ending over the next four months, and another show, King of the Hill, has been axed as well. And on top of all that, two other comics I've enjoyed a great deal, Justice League Unlimited and Checkmate, have ended over the past few months as well.

To be fair, a few of the titles ending are being relaunched in some form or another -- Birds of Prey, the Flash, Nightwing, Robin as Gotham Girls, Flash: Rebirth, Red Robin, and Batman and Robin -- but it's not the same. Kick in the head is what it all is I tell you.

Things I Should Probably Know By Now But Am Too Lazy To Find Out For Certain

How long does it take to hard boil and egg?

How often should you water a plant?

How long should you lather shampoo before rinsing it out?

How long should an oven pre-heat before putting something in?

What exactly is Twitter?


Why do some TV shows run for seven-eight years, while others barely manage two or three?

Just a thought...

But when do you think movie studios are going to stop having to put those warnings on DVD boxes because people have realized that the black bars on the top and bottom of the picture are normal. Seems like folks would've realized it's normal by now, what with widescreen TVs and all. Just a thought.

The Most Perfect Minute of Television...

It starts part-way through The Simpsons episode "The Itchy and Scratchy Movie" with the scene of Bart and Homer eating popsicles outside the house while Homer explains how he avoided jury duty ("The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races"), and ends with Marge asking if Homer wants Bart to "become Chief Justice of the Supreme Court or a sleazy male stripper?". To which he replies, "can't he be both, like the late Earl Warren?".

Probably the most perfect minute of television you're going to find.

And Now for Something Different...

Here's five news stories I'm tired of seeing, seemingly every night:

1) Young attractive starlet/pseudo celebrity is "up to it again"

Is this news? Does anyone actually enjoy hearing about what Britney Spears or Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan or that "Hannah Montana" kid is up to today? I understand there's an interest the lives of the celebrities and all that, but the other night I caught a story about Britney Spears's custody situation with her ex-husband (who for reasons I cannot explain but amuse me nonetheless I'll refer to as K-Fed) and it really felt like enough was enough. It's gone from news to being an invasion of privacy and is becoming unsettling to see.

2) Barack Obama is "up to it again"

Instead of continuing to either stir the pot and call Obama on every gaffe or incorrect statement he's made, or continue to further the idea that he's anti-American, a Muslim, or 'the-rumor-of-the-moment', how about focusing on the man's policy ideas? I mean, he's only running for President of the United States, and, let's face it, he's probably going to win. Isn't it a good idea to start discussing this stuff without having the conversation slide into sixth grade gossip fits?

3) Local county fairs

Enough with sending reporters to your county fairs or outside festivals or the like. The interviews with the local participants or organizers are always really awkward and offer the same talking points over and over again. It's nice you're letting us know what's going on, but, honestly, I think we all have a pretty good idea that there's going to be snacks, live concerts, and face painting, so you don't really need to spend fives minutes reminding us of this.

4) Local high school sports news

I didn't follow high school sports while I was in high school, why would I want to see footage of a bunch of tenth graders playing basketball when there are professional athletes out there? I understand that high school sports, particularly football, are important in some areas, but cover them during the morning or late night news and save the prime news time for... I don't want to say real news stories, but you get the idea.

5) Pets

There's a time and a place for pets on the news. You have your SPCA folks on the noon news hour, and your amazing pet story for the end of the nightly news to counter the dozen or so depressing stories that preceded it. Any altering of this delicate balance is subject to my ire.

As I started writing this I hadn't planned on being so negative, but I guess the thought of news stories that get on my nerves got me going.