Well This is a Kick in the Head

First, I'd like to apologize for all of the nerd-heavy posts lately. On one hand I try to limit it to stuff that I'd hope folks might find interesting even if they're comic related. On the other it's easier writing about colorful funny book pamphlets than, you know, actually relevant stuff, so there you go.

That said, I read today that Dwayne McDuffie's been fired off the Justice League comic for discussing the editorial side of writing that book, specifically mandated tie-ins to other stories, characters being off-limits, writing a scene where a deceased character is mourned in a cemetary and then finding out they decided they weren't really dead after all (leaving the background tombstones curiously out of place), that kind of stuff.

But even being hamstrung as he was, I thought the book was doing pretty good. Not great, but there was still enough stuff in every issue to make it an entertaining read. And of course, I found out about this after finishing the latest issue, musing over the better bits as I checked out a few of my usual online haunts.

This is a real kick in the head. Really stinks.

The Adding Random Pictures to Songs from the 1980s to Make Them Look Profound and Kind of Sad Post, Vol. 1

"Time After Time"
by Cyndi Lauper and Rob Hyman

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick and think of you


Caught up in circles, confusion is nothing new
Flash back warm night, almost left behind
Suitcase of memories
Time after sometime you pictured me
I'm walking too far ahead
You're callin' to me
I can't hear what you've said
Then you said, "Go slow, I fall behind"
The second hand unwinds


If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting
Time after time

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting
Time after time


After my picture fades
And darkness has turned to grey
Watching through windows
You're wondering if I'm OK
Secrets stolen from deep inside
The drum beats out of time


If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting
Time after time


You said, "Go slow, I fall behind"
The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you, I'll be waiting
Time after time


Time after time

My "Best Of", Vol. 1

So I was reading a few "best of" lists, and seeing a few things I've quite enjoyed over the years pop up got me thinking about a few of my own personal "best ofs". So, assuming my tastes are as valued by an anonymous reader as they are by myself, here's a list of comic books that were I stranded on the deserted island and not driven to madness through a lack of nourishment and exposure to the sun, I'd be content re-reading until being rescued at some later date.

Deadpool (volume three) #1-25, by Joe Kelly, Ed McGuinness, Pete Woods, Walter McDaniel, and others

I'm thrilled that Marvel Comics has finally gotten around to collecting this run, since it's pretty much the gold standard of comic book serialized storytelling for me. Not only did writer Joe Kelly and artists Ed McGuinness, Pete Woods, and Walter McDaniel define Deadpool so effectively that the character has remained a headlining title character since this series began back in late 1996, but they told a story that rivals the best of TV's long-form storytelling back before it was the norm for TV or comics. And the best thing is they did without the slightest hint that it was the plan all along, or without compromising Deadpool's character, a feat all the more impressive when you realize the story ended with Deadpool saving the world from an other-worldly "menace" (curious what I mean, then read the books). The upswing in Deadpool's popularity thanks to his well-received current series and appearance in the Wolverine film has given Marvel a perfect opportunity to get around to reprinting the entire run (preferably in their popular omnibus format), especially since the last collection ended just shy of the acclaimed and as-yet unprinted eleventh issue that "inserted" Deadpool into an old issue of Spider-Man. Either way, it's great that folks are checking out these old issues through the reprints or original issues, since it's worthy of the attention.

X-Force (volume one) #116-129, by Peter Milligan, Mike Allred, and others

I've written about the Milligan-Allred X-Force before so sorry if I'm repeating myself, but these issues are so subversively brilliant that I can say enough good things about them. Sold as a media satire told through superheroes with Peter Milligan's razor-sharp wit and the old-school style of Mike Allred, the brilliance of this run for me was how strongly I felt toward the characters by the final issue. As their layers were peeled back during the highly enjoyable run, the fact that the characters that seemed shallow and self-involved were as fully realized as any character I've ever seen elevated the series to a special place, and made me kick myself for not following the run more regularly as it was first coming out (I stopped four issues in, only coming back to the series after seeing the cast profiled in Marvel's Handbook series). The run continued for an additional twenty-five issues as X-Statix, but these first fourteen are the cream of the crop for me (admittedly because of the death of one of the leads at the end of this series, a character whose absence was so keenly felt that the first year of X-Statix devoted two issues to the character, as though to admit the creative team was as aware of the void as the readership was).

Well, that's the first part of my "Best Of". I'll add the rest of my ramblings soon.

Declarative Jack Sez...

Y'know What I've Noticed...

So there's this Archie Comics character Cheryl Blossom. You might not have heard of her since she's a relatively recent addition to the cast (from the early 1980s which is a good chunk of time ago, but about 40 years after most of the other characters debuted), but she's headlined her own title and appeared frequently in new stories and through reprints when she hasn't shown up for a while.

Thing is, Cheryl's 'character' is that... how can I put this... she's the promiscuous one. As much as she can be in an Archie Comic, that is. So while they can't even really imply she's... how can I put this... 'winding the crank on Archie's jalopy', she still parades around in skimpy clothing with plenty of skin and cleavage on display. Which is all well and good. I mean, if you're a kid that kind of stuff drives you wild.

So today while reading an article on pointless Archie Comics characters, I stumbled on a link to Cheryl's first appearance, and while it's pretty tame by most standards, by Archie standards it's awfully risqué stuff (as I'm sure you've noticed by the out of context 'topless beach' and 'sneaky beer drinking' bits sprinkled throughout this posting).

So reading it, I've noticed that it's not hard to see why it's been seldom (if ever) been reprinted, what with the underaged drinking and topless seventeen year-old. Kind of makes me wonder if Dan DeCarlo was responsible for those stories where Veronica lost her top while swimming, or the one where the Riverdale High heater was on the fritz and all of the kids stripped down to their underwear to deal with the heat. Not to necessarily say they were bad stories,
but pretty much the whole point was to show as much teenaged cartoon skin as possible, which, ah... I have mixed feelings about.

And by mixed feelings I don't mean to say that I find naked Archie characters titillating or anything, just that... well, you know, I mean... if you were on a beach and a girl took her top off... um, that... ah... I think I'm going to stop here.

I'm not a weirdo.

The Ending to Every 1980's Movie in Four Minutes (with bonus footnotes)

80's Ending
It's funny, because I think I might actually have greater awareness of the clichés demonstrated in this clip because of videos like this one that rip on these clichés.* Not that I haven't seen my fair share of 80s teen comedies and the like ("Revenge of the Nerds", "Just One of the Guys"... ah... when did "If Looks Could Kill" come out?)**, but I was too young to see these movies when they were coming out, and by the time I was a teenager all I could see was the stuff they lampoon here.*** Now I'm actually a little scared at the thought that in ten years someone will dissect "American Pie", "Never Been Kissed", and "She's All That" and all of the teen comedies that came out in my formative years and point out how ridiculous they were, even if they tried to jump the gun on that sort of thing with that "(Fill in the Blank) Movie" spoof they did about a decade ago (which would probably be included in the dissection anyway).****

* Like South Park's "Asspen", which introduced me to the 'regular guy competing against arrogant jock and winning the heart of the dorky-but-hot-girl'.
** Just remembered "Say Anything" and "Fast Times at Ridgemont High", but they weren't that bad.
*** Being a teenager in the savvy and cynical late-90s, early-00s, as I was.
**** This film being a reflection of my generation's savviness and cynicism toward the genre, because, really we all knew how lousy these movies were as they were coming out but went to see them anyway.

At the Moment...

I'm a too stuffed up at the moment to form much of a coherent thought for an update (my sinuses being as sensitive as they are).

Still, thought I'd stop by to say that I caught "Wolverine" on the weekend and thought it was pretty decent. Not a great film, but pretty enjoyable and fun all the same. Wish Deadpool was a little truer to the comics (at least during his appearance later in the film -- Ryan Reynolds nailed the part during the first bit), but it's a good enough set up for a spin-off film. Not really getting all of the bad press and feedback the movie's been getting, but to each their own I suppose. I'd recommend it.

Anyway, I'm feeling a little too bowling ball-ish to say much else, so I'm going to sign off. See you.