Declarative George Sez...

Y'know... I Don't Really Care for "Glee"

It's funny -- I meant to write about this a little while ago after watching the first and second episodes of "Glee", but I guess I couldn't muster the enthusiasm to get around to it. It's not surprising, I suppose. I mean, It's not like I thought "Glee", the "little show that could" du jour, was an awful show. For one thing, it has all the ingredients of a show that I'd enjoy: Musical numbers, a good cast, teenagers played by people that look like teenagers, quirky dialogue, the confidence to make it's characters look stupid and people rip on them for it, etc. And yet... it all feels very patchwork. Like it's trying too hard. It feels like the Disney Channel version of something that's actually entertaining.

Worst of all, the musical numbers aren't all that fun. Sure some of the songs are catchy and well-orchestrated, but instead of totally embracing what they're doing it all feels too safe, like they're trying not to offend their target demographic. The only thing worse than something that's just plain bad is something that's frustratingly close to being good. I wouldn't say "Glee" is necessarily just shy of being a good series (or downright awful for that matter), but it's certainly frustrating how it has all of the components of a good show but is content to proceed in mediocrity.

Things I Find Terribly Vexing This Month, Vol.1

I'd completely forgotten about this until I heard a mention of Mr. Coffee on an episode of Seinfeld a a minute ago (the episode where Jerry dates the Miss America pageant contestant for anyone curious). There was a comic book that came out about the time the first Spider-Man film was released that, not surprisingly, featured a return of the Green Goblin. Following a heated battle between Spidey and the Goblin, the two were so winded that they had to rest against a wall; it was during this downtime that the Goblin told Spider-Man that before settling on the "Green Goblin" he'd briefly considered calling himself "Mr. Coffee", making the two laugh. But only the two of them. I thought it was a pretty lame joke, but at least I get why the characters would laugh.

So, seven years later I'm in a supermarket and I find a copy of this... how can I put this... "deluxe edition" comic book that had a few pages of new material, some remastered old issues from the 1960s all dolled up with modern coloring techniques, a couple of handbook profiles, and a history of the Green Goblin done with some text and images from older issues. Since I was catching the bus home and had a good half hour to kill, I started reading some of that back-matter, specifically the skippable the "Green Goblin Saga" history thing. (Just so we're clear, it's just the history thing that's pretty skippable. Not the handbook profiles -- I get a real kick of those. The "Saga" stuff leaves me cold.) But anyway, I'm reading this thing and it gets to the origin of the Green Goblin and mentions that Norman Osborn considered Mr. Coffee as a name before going with Green Goblin.

Now I'm normally big on obscure references and callbacks and archaic trivia and all that, but really now -- "Mr. Coffee" is canon? A lame joke is now an arguably key component of the Green Goblin's history?

Just so we're clear, I'm not angered or anything by how "Mr. Coffee" has seemingly become such an important part of the Green Goblin's back story. It might read that I'm full of rage, but I assure you I'm, if anything, relaxed to the point of distraction here (I've had to proofread this post several times already just to be sure it makes sense). Still, I find this terribly vexing. I mean, really -- Mr. Coffee? Yeesch.

 

More Songs I Can't Stand!

I'm so, so, so very sorry to foist more melodic abominations upon you dear reader, but there's something strangely cathartic about realizing the awful music you were bombarded with as a kid is actually awful. I mean, sure you might've listened to it and acted like all was well, but the whole time you were thinking this is garbage. It's nice to get that kind of thing out there.

Not that I expect anyone else to really care about what kind of music I dislike, but hey, isn't the point of a blog to put your pointless opinion out there for an uninterested world to see? And even if you could care less about what I've got to say, at least you get some awful music out it, right?

The Problem with People Who Speak Their Minds...

The only problem with people who speak their minds is unless they have a whole lot going on up there, most of what they say is probably going to be pretty awful.

And with that I direct you Megan Fox's latest bit of delightful incoherence where she equates Transformers director Michael Bay to Hitler. And then, possibly even more embarrassingly, a pre-pubescent thirteen year-old boy:

"He’s like Napoleon and he wants to create this insane, infamous mad-man reputation. He wants to be like Hitler on his sets, and he is. So he’s a nightmare to work for but when you get him away from set, and he’s not in director mode, I kind of really enjoy his personality because he’s so awkward, so hopelessly awkward. He has no social skills at all. And it’s endearing to watch him. He’s vulnerable and fragile in real life and then on set he’s a tyrant. Shia and I almost die when we make a Transformers movie."

Oh Megan Fox. You never fail to disappoint, I'll give you that.

I also freely cop to the fact that in spite of that bizarre soundbite I'm not above ogling a picture of Ms. Fox in varying states of undress while appearing to make-out with herself. Not that being willing to admit this makes it any better, I suppose.

Via Entertainment Weekly (which has a whole lot of Megan Fox hilarity besides this latest bit).

Three Songs I Can't Stand

Hope I don't offend anyone, but here are three songs that make me want to bash my head into a wall. For what it's worth, a few of my jackass friends really enjoy Depeche Mode. Not sure about their opinions on the other two though. Either way I'd rather eat a light bulb than listen to them another time.

And with that, enjoy!




Pretty bad, huh?

My Starbucks and iTunes D'oh

I was in Chicago the other day and grabbed a couple of those Starbucks iTunes song redemption cards at a Starbucks in a Target. Which is pretty wild. I wish there were more Starbucks in places like that. Not that we have Targets in Canada, but most of them are in Chapters (Canada's equivalent to Borders and Barnes and Noble) with a handful of separate locations besides. And really, you can never have enough Starbucks. There's the tops.

But anyway, I tried to redeem one of the codes and it didn't work since it was designed for the US iTunes and not the Canadian one (yeah, there's a difference, and don't think I'm not cheesed off by that). It's for Yusuf, the artist known as Cat Stevens' "Welcome Home". The codes are 9W3NAXLFPYWK and KWYRYYW6AFAJ. If you use them, just let me know so I can check them off.

Chicago was nice, by the way. Did a bit of a driving tour of the downtown, went by Target for some cheap tube socks, Cherry Coke Zero and Pretzels, and caught "(500) Days of Summer" at an AMC by the theater. It was a nice little trip.

What the - - ?

Now, I'm not an English professor, and on occasion I've even been known to mispronounce easy to say words like "crayon" and "thermometer", but can someone explain what this woman is trying to say. I heard a few familiar words there, but the order in which they're spoken vexes me.



Vexing. Definitely vexing.

Cripes.

I think I have the swine flu. Which stinks. Not that it's that big a deal, I mean, it's just a new version of the flu that's considered risky because most folks immune systems aren't familiar with it, but darn if it doesn't sting all the same. Especially the name. I haven't told my friends about my suspicion yet because I'm not sure I want to give them an invitation to make pig jokes about me. I didn't even think I had it until I saw a list of symptoms at the local drug store -- until that point I'd figured my coughing was related to how dehydrated and sore my throat got at my grandmother's funeral (it was ridiculously hot and humid that day, and the heavy suit, a lack of air conditioning, and a 90 minute funeral service did a number on me), and that my stuffy nose was just my allergies acting up (as is the norm this time of year anyway). Still, I suppose I have been fatigued lately and have had a decrease in my usual appetite.

Hopefully it'll pass soon, especially since I've realized I might have it. It's been about a week and a half now since I've been coughing and all that, which is usually the amount of time a mild case lasts. Still, the fact I might have it really stinks. It's a real kick in the head.

My Almost Quandary (of Sorts)

So, Ally McBeal is coming to DVD later this year and Fox, for some reason but arguably a welcome one, is releasing the first season and the complete series at the same time. Back in the day I watched Ally McBeal fervently -- it was probably the first "grown-up" series I really enjoyed and followed regularly. At least the first dramatic one, since I did, curiously, watch Murphy Brown for a good three to four pre-puberty years, and that was a pretty grown up show. Granted Ally McBeal wasn't a straight up drama, but it was more serious than most of the shows I'd been following to that point in my life. And it was pretty enjoyable. For the first two or three years at least. Then it got kind of... not good. But the first few years were good enough to buy the show 'viewer credit' with me, and I stuck through to the end with it.

And so my quandary lies with the DVD releases. I'm looking forward to revisiting the show, but, well, I'm concerned how it'll hold up. I have fond memories of the show and if it hasn't aged well, that'd be pretty disappointing. I'd really hate to find out it's as lame as my friends thought it was went I was watching it new, but since my initial viewership was part genuine enjoyment and part 'watching a prime time drama for the first time, all adult and such (and on a school night, no less!)', I have a feeling it might not hold up. I probably wouldn't even have these fears if I hadn't caught part of a first season episode when I went to Mexico a few years back (specifically the one where Ally humiliated a guy by making him walk around with pants around his ankles, and yes, it's a good as it sounds...), and part of me would rather leave it be as a show I enjoyed from my teen years than find out it stinks.

On the other hand, Peter McNicol's John Cage was the man, so that might be enough to make me buy the bloody thing, quality be damned. I mean, say what you will about the show, but John Cage was really awesome.