So, it was my birthday

I'd been feeling a little better over the past few days and looking forward to my birthday allowed the possibility of something great happening that would make me feel great. Didn't quite work out like I'd hoped -- got a few nice things, but mostly stuff I'd bought for myself. Went out for dinner with John, Edmond, and Kerr to Boston Pizza. Felt pretty crummy going in, but better afterwards. Still feeling down but better than I was. Birthday wasn't all that I was hoping it'd be, but I guess I've got to stop getting too excited about things since that usually results in me feeling down when it doesn't pan out. You think I'd know by now, but there you go.

Sorry for the depressing message. Here's a couple of pictures of cute animals to lighten things up.

Hi there.

I had a good weekend, better than the last few weeks. A Starbucks opened in my neighborhood and I've been stopping in every few days for a white chocolate mocca. Got a haircut and started going through my grandmother's things since it's all but certain she'll have to go to a home. Not much else to really report on, but that all kept me busy and I'm feeling a little bit better.

In Lieu of Actual Content... Part V.

Hi there.

For about the fifth or sixth time, in lieu of actual content, because, let's face it, my week was so uninteresting it would bore you to hear the details of it, here're some funny, whimsical, and possibly annoying Youtube clips:







That said, I've been giving more thought to getting around to my earlier promise of writing about my dislike of people typing "ya" when they mean "yeah", especially since I had someone type that to me the other day. I may get around to that, yet.

Hi there.

Still not feeling too good. Had a good day last Sunday -- I went to an Indigo book store with a couple of friends and got a few things to read and a Starbucks coffee. Had a nice dinner afterwards and even won a toy from a claw machine game. It's kind of been mixed since. Was riding the good day into the week, but it just got crummier after. My grandmother woke up with a sore back that got progressively worse until she had to go to the hospital. I spent about three hours with her and effectively screwed up my back on an uncomfortable chair in the process. Didn't sleep well last night and woke up aching and with a headache today. Still, the new episode of the Spider-Man cartoon wasn't bad, so there's that. Not feeling too good still. Hoping things get better, but I'm not overly optimistic. I think I need to get a new anti-depressant prescribed. I'm seeing my therapist on Thursday, so I'll bring it up then.

Anyway, hope to have more upbeat things to report on next time.

My Comforts This Week

Haven't been feeling too good lately. The whole business with my computer and a few bad days have brought me down and I haven't been able to get myself back up again. Hoping to have a good day this weekend to bring me up, but I'm getting by with what I have.


Coke Zero is pretty good -- tastes like regular Coke, but with the goodness of a diet drink. Can't tell you what a delight that is, since I love regular Coke but find the diet kind of flat.



I finally got around to reading Watchmen, and it lived up to all of my expectations and the hype and all that. Just an absolutely amazing piece of fiction. If anything, I'd say it was maybe a little underrated -- I was surprised by the wonderful character work, when I'd mostly been made aware of the story points and such.




And I had a couple of slices of Pesto Amore pizza from Pizza Pizza, and that stuff is always good. If you haven't tried it and you live in Ontario, I heartily recommend it.


That's my week. Such as it is. Hope there's more bright spots to come.

Yay! My computer's working again.

After being out of town for a week, I came back to a computer that crapped out on me an hour or two into getting caught up on a few of my usual online haunts. I finally got it running again yesterday and figured I'd stop by here since I still have that "updated weekly" thing at the top of the page. I should probably change that. Hm.

Anyway, nothing new has really happened lately. Had a good time in Windsor. Have been keeping busy since I got back. I did think of something worth posting the other day. Probably a rant about an advirtising campaign if the last couple of posts are any indication. I do have an idea for another post, something to the effect that people who write "ya" when they mean to say "yeah" are idiots, but I'll save that for another post and a less pleasant mood.

Things That Just Occurred to Me

There's this commercial that's been airing for a little while -- couldn't say how long, but probably not more than a month or two -- with a bunch of twenty and thirty-somethings singing on buses and streets and whatever. Honestly, I rarely pay attention to commercials. Usually I read something or am on the computer during them, but I still hear them and usually when I see them I'm surprised by the product. So I finally see what this commercial is for, and it's for Smarties. For folks living outside Canada (because, as I've just learned, Smarties are only sold here), Smarties are a soft shell, colorful candy treat, not unlike M & Ms.

Which brought me to my realization: Why do they make Smarties when M & Ms are so much better?
It's not like anyone could possibly have an attachment to the Smarties product. They're smaller than M & Ms, which, by the way, come in a variety of different flavors too. You couldn't fit a nut inside a Smartie if you tried. And taste-wise they're really quite inferior to M & Ms, which have a harder candy shell, pack more chocolate, and top it off with their logo. Plus Smarties has had some of the most asinine advertising campaigns I've ever seen. "When you eat your Smarties, do you eat the red ones last?" -- what does that even mean? Compare that and the recent campaign that really has nothing to do with a soft-shell candy until the logo comes up at the end of the ad to the long-running M & Ms voiced by Billy West and J K Simmons and you come up woefully short.

Don't know why it took me so long to come to this realization, but it seems like it's been a long time coming. If you actually like Smarties, sorry if I disagree with you. But I honestly doubt anyone likes Smarties enough to write in to argue otherwise.

Declarative Jack Sez:

What is it with some people?

Does anyone else have this kind of problem? I have a good friend -- we've known each other since elementary school -- and the guy just crosses the line a lot. Not all the time, but he'll just say something so incendiary that it makes me want to cut off contact with the guy. First time was during an argument with another friend. Can't remember the details, but it ended with me telling him he screwed up. So this other guy, let's call him Sean (that being his name and all), comes in and tells me "my whole life is a screw up, and all I do is sit around on my fat ass". Now replace "screw" with an expletive my PG-13 mentality prevents me from posting here, and you'll understand why I felt like punching him in the face.

Actually, now that I think of it -- and since I'm loathe to go back and edit this post for fear I'll lose my train of thought -- the first time was when I was at a pub with a few of guys, and Sean. I went to use the men's room and Sean thought it would be funny to throw wet paper towels at me. And then he pinched me in front of the waitress. Not just a little pinch. The son of a bitch grabbed me. After the fact it occurred to me that we were there for four hours, so that might've had something to do with my foul mood, but it was an unpleasant experience all around.

The third time was on messenger. I add that Sean is stubborn. Pleasant, most of the time, and actually very funny (more on that in a bit), but very stubborn. So when I was trying to have a serious conversation with Sean about my depression, I was taken aback by his attitude that I "just do it", whatever that might be, however difficult that might be. I tried to explain that it doesn't work that way, that, a lot of time, I don't have the drive to do the things I most enjoy these days. And the conversation went as follows:

Sean: those are all just excuses.......millions of ppl with depression do things for themselves........... you just chose not to

Me: Sean. I'm so offended by what you just said. I don't dispute that I'm lazy, but my life has ground to a halt by very serious depression that I've only just begun to feel like I'm making any forward movement through. I find it terribly offensive that you'd attribute any lack of movement to my own choice.

Sean: maybe it was your lifestyle that led to the depression, in which case it kind of was your choice........... i dont think depression is something that should be prevelant in someone your age. you have it good.....you just gotta find better ways of dealing with problems

Me: I can't even have this conversation with you right now.

Sean: thats also the problem.....

Me: If you want to know what is the cause of my depression, I'll have a frank conversation with you, but not over messenger.

Sean: you always want help but dont want to listen


The conversation went on a little longer. And that was, as far as I was concerned, the third strike. Thing is, I have a small handful of friends, and despite their faults, I can't afford to lose one. So after not speaking to him for a week or so, it more or less returned to business as usual. Until tonight. I just find myself unable to deal with Sean's negative attitude. And the stupid thing is why I'm so frustrated now. We were talking. He told me about this female comedian -- and he uses the term loosely -- that he went to high school with and he hates, mostly because she has the nerve to refer to herself as a comedian when, and I can attest to this as well, she isn't particularly funny. So I told Sean, who, as noted, is actually quite naturally funny. An angry sort of funny, but funny all the same. And what did he choose to tell me after telling him he was funny and should try putting together an act? That he'd "pull my bowels out my mouth" next time he saw me.

Yup. That's right. But I rolled with it. He's an 'angry funny', after all. I even told him that was funny, questioning how that sort of thing would even work. His reply doesn't bear repeating, but I found it needlessly vulgar and mean-spirited, hardly the sort of thing you'd tell a friend during a pleasant conversation.

So that's where I'm at right now. This guy is a close friend, but he's an asshole. Do I keep hanging out with this guy and run the risk of having him say something like that again, or do I lose a friend. It's something I've been thinking about and figured I'd put into words. Maybe it'll help me sort through it. It's not the sort of thing that makes compelling reading, I suppose, but it's helpful for me. If you did read through it, hope you liked it, hope I didn't sound whiny (or at least, too whiny).

I'm Back Online

My internet's been down for the past week, but it's up and running now. Haven't got a whole lot to say... Been keeping busy. Was going to go tobogganing with my friends, but they got drunk and played Guitar Hero instead. Watched the Super Bowl, fell asleep half way through. Went to see Juno and really enjoyed it -- it was a really satisfying film, with very real and extraordinarily well-written characters. Just a solid film.


Great poster too. I've been getting movie posters lately -- Naked Gun, There's Something About Mary -- and I really like the Juno poster. Might get it. Don't have the wall-space for it, but it's pretty sharp, all the same. Can't really think of much else to write about. Haven't been writing as much as I'd like to lately, but I'm hoping to get back into that and keep busy. Hope I have more to write about next time I remember I have a blog.